Mission Implausible

So it happened again! Yes my computer is up to her old tricks and not working. It seems that my second motherboard had crashed. Do you have any idea how much of a pain this is to be in a new country, supposedly starting a new ministry? For starters I cannot write proposals or answer emails. Brilliant!

I have been here before and I know I will survive this too, but today I am just fed up with annoyances like this. Why is it that everything has to be that much harder when you are already in the middle of a difficult situation? Can it get any worse you ask yourself – apparently it can and will.

I am soooooooo frustrated and I am caught between a rockier and harder place. Stretching my last dollars in a foreign country and now this. I know God has an incredible sense of humour and impeccable timing when it comes to my life, but sometimes it would be nice to be in on the joke – you know? I know it is pointless to ask myself why this why now because my inner voice says why not you and why not now?

I know this is not the end and I should not be melodramatic, but this feels like this I cannot go forward without some serious readjustment. Plus, lets face it people I am tired! So in my most immediate and implausible future I am trying to deal without. I thought I knew most of the things I would let go of as I stepped into this adventure (jokes on me for even thinking this is possible), and now I have been dropped kicked into the reality that nothing is certain…again.

Where do I walk from here? I do not know, all I know is that I need to walk. I will be an annoyance to my co-workers in borrowing their computers in the wee hours of the morning so I can work. It would not be so bad if there we not about 10 other crucial things of this magnitude gnawing at my brain to be dealt with. Everything from bank accounts that do not work to theft weigh on me. Each time requires a mustering of beyond human strength to carry on.

God give me strength to inch my way to the edge of the cliff once more, leap and hope the net appears.